EPISODE 05.

Your Body Is Listening: The Science of How You Speak to Yourself

Oxygen for Women Podcast

with Perry Janssen

This episode explores something incredibly important and extremely disruptive to how most of us were taught to relate to ourselves: the way you speak to your body. This isn't woo-woo. It's based on decades of research from neuroscience, neuroimmunology, and behavioral medicine.

Your internal voice isn't just psychological; it's biological and physiological. Your body is listening to you every day, all day. Perry breaks down the science of how internal language affects physical health, stress hormones, immune response, and healing. And offers a simple nervous system practice to shift the conversation from pressure to presence.

Key Topics Covered

The Science Behind Self-Talk

Decades of research from institutions like Harvard's Chan School and universities worldwide confirm:

• Your internal voice isn't just psychological—it's biological and physiological
• Your body is listening to you
• Internal language affects the nervous system and immune response at a measurable level

What the Research Shows

In multiple studies, participants engaged in compassionate, supportive inner speech directed toward their bodies using phrases like:

• "You're safe"
• "You're allowed to rest"
• "I'm with you"
• "Thank you for protecting me"

After as little as two weeks, researchers observed:

• Measurable reductions in inflammatory markers
• Lower levels of stress hormones like cortisol
• Improved blood flow
• Enhanced immune cell efficiency

Important distinction: Researchers weren't studying belief systems, optimism, or just mindset—they were studying feedback loops and how words change the body.

Affective Signaling: Why Words Change the Body

• Your nervous system doesn't distinguish very well between a threatening voice outside of you and a threatening voice inside you
• The brain interprets your internal speech as real emotional input, not abstract thoughts
• This is called "affective signaling"

When your inner voice is harsh, critical, or dismissive, the body responds as if danger is present:

• Increased cortisol
• Muscle tightening
• Reduced digestion
• Slower cellular repair
• Heightened inflammation (and inflammation is a significant health concern)

When inner speech becomes warmer, steadier, more compassionate and tender, the nervous system shifts:

• Fear decreases
• Cortisol drops
• Blood flow improves
• Repair processes turn back on

This isn't mindset. This is neurobiology.

Your Body Listens to Tone Before Meaning

One of the most important findings: Your body is listening to how warm you're talking to it before it listens to the content.

The body doesn't ask:

• "Is this thought true?"
• "Is this logical?"
• "Is this productive?"

The body asks: "Am I safe?"

Examples:

• "I should be better by now" may sound reasonable but lands as a threat
• "I'm here with you" (even without fixing anything) lands as safety

Safety is what allows healing.

Why This Matters So Much for Women

Many women have spent a lifetime in self-correction mode:

• Monitoring, adjusting, critiquing, judging, pushing, shaming, comparing
• Not because that's how they were born, but because it's what they learned
• They were trained to survive in systems that awarded endurance, not embodiment

When symptoms show up (fatigue, anxiety, pain, burnout, emotional numbness), the reflex is often: "What's wrong with me?"

The research invites a different question:

• What has my body been responding to for years?
• Chronic self-pressure?
• Chronic self-judgment?
• Chronic emotional vigilance?

The body doesn't argue with those messages—it adapts to them until it can't.

Guided Practice: Simple Nervous System Reset

Perry offers a body-based practice to make this real, not just theoretical:

1. Find contact with your body: Sit if you can, or just feel into your body if you're driving. Place one hand on your body—chest, belly, anywhere that feels neutral (recognizing that women have a lot of judgment about the body, so it can be tricky).
2. No pressure to perform: You don't need to relax, feel grateful, or think positive—just notice contact with yourself. Slowly get in touch with your breathing.
3. Speak to yourself (silently or aloud)—it doesn't matter which:
   • "You don't have to fight right now"
   • "You don't have to effort right now"
   • "I'm listening" (really embody listening to what's happening inside you)
   • "I'm gonna take care of you. I am here for you."
4. Notice any shifts: Even slight changes in your breath, a softening, a sense of space. That's not imagination—that's your nervous system responding to affective safety.

Key insight: We have been taught to be in relationship with our body as producers (get things done, make the body function the way we want it to). But we're rarely in deep, loving relationship with the body.

Core Research Conclusion

After decades of research, one conclusion keeps emerging:

Self-talk shapes:

• Emotional regulation
• Stress resilience
• Healing trajectories
• Immune response
• Long-term health outcomes

Not because words are magic (though Perry thinks they are kind of magical), but because the body is relational. It responds to how it's addressed.

One lead researcher summarized: "Your body hears what your mind says every day, all day."

The Reframe

Perhaps healing doesn't begin with fixing (which actually comes from one of the stress states), but with changing the relationship you have with your body.

If your body has been tense, tired, or reactive:

• It's not broken or wrong
• There isn't something wrong with it
• It's listening faithfully to you every day, all day
• To a voice that may never have learned how to be kind

And that's learned. That's not how we are born. And that is something you can change—one sentence at a time.

Powerful Quotes

"Your internal voice isn't just psychological. It's biological. It's physiological. And your body is really listening to you."

"Your nervous system doesn't distinguish very well between a threatening voice outside of you and a threatening voice inside you."

"Your body is listening to how warm you were talking to it before it listens to the content."

"The body doesn't ask, 'Is this thought true? Is this logical? Is this productive?' It asks, 'Am I safe?'"

"'I should be better by now' may sound reasonable but lands as a threat. 'I'm here with you' lands as safety."

"This isn't mindset. This is neurobiology."

"We were trained to survive in systems that awarded endurance, not embodiment."

"The body doesn't argue with those messages—it adapts to them until it can't."

"We have been taught to be in relationship with our body as producers. But we're rarely in deep, loving relationship with the body."

"Your body hears what your mind says every day, all day."

"Perhaps healing doesn't begin with fixing, but with changing the relationship you have with it."

"If your body has been tense, tired, or reactive, it's not broken or wrong. It's listening faithfully to you every day, all day, to a voice that may never have learned how to be kind. And that's learned. That's not how we are born. And that is something you can change—one sentence at a time."

Perry's 2026 Mission

Helping women understand and regulate their nervous systems—addressing the immense emotional and physical responses she's seeing in her practice and making things safe inside ourselves.

About Oxygen for Women

Oxygen for Women is a restorative movement for women recovering and reclaiming themselves and their bodies from stress culture, trauma, and toxic standards that were never meant to be normal.

Each week on this podcast:

• We slow things down
• We talk honestly about what women are carrying
• We bring the nervous system back into the conversation
• We practice a different way of living—one rooted in safety, self-connection, and wholeness

Call to Action

Subscribe to Oxygen for Women wherever you're listening. Subscribing is a simple way to give yourself:

• A weekly pause
• A weekly break
• A breath of renewal
• A reminder that your body, your voice, and your needs matter

Go deeper: Find ways to work with Perry and join the movement at perryjansen.com

Closing Reminder

Be gentle with yourself. Your body is listening. 

 Oxygen for Women: The space to exhale the pressure and reconnect with who you truly are.